don’t be provoked
Leading teams is hard.
Partially because people are complex, and sometimes misguided in their beliefs about the world. In Meditations, Marcus Aurelius said that a person’s soul is dyed by the color of its thoughts. I completely agree. And as I see it, it’s why things like entitlement or having a victim mindset hang onto people so tightly.
When leading people, you inevitably find yourself with a vocal few thrusting their beliefs onto others. Cancer loves to spread. I feel it’s important to listen to what they’re saying, and maybe not saying. Think of it like diagnostic imaging, take a scientific approach to the problem. In doing so, you’ll inevitably be hit with some things that feel personal. They’re not; don’t let the broken thoughts of another person push you from your path. In situations like this, I’m reminded of the Epictetus quote about our minds being complicit in the provocation of others.
“Remember, it is not enough to be hit or insulted to be harmed, you must believe that you are being harmed. If someone succeeds in provoking you, realize that your mind is complicit in the provocation. Which is why it is essential that we not respond impulsively to impressions; take a moment before reacting, and you will find it easier to maintain control.”
Like most things, it comes down to focusing on the things you can control. You can’t control the belief systems of others. You can’t control the things people say or the stories they tell. You can, however, control how you respond to these things. Be intentional and kind, lead from a place of objective truth. Be diagnostic, take deliberate action, and let the rest go.